Monologuing

Seriously, Steve.  You can’t give me any pointers?  How does one become good at college?  I clearly suck at it.

I transferred to a new university this semester because I was so set on becoming a better student.  I guess I did something wrong along the way.  I’ve begun to stay up later.  I don’t get to sleep before 3am, usually.  This causes me to get very little sleep, and then I wake up late.  In fact, today I had a class at 10:00am.  I woke up at 9, and while the water was running in the shower, I went to sleep in the tub.

Anyway, I missed my art history midterm last Thursday.  Why?  The whole oversleeping thing.  I was actually pretty depressed for the entire day.  I couldn’t get a hold of my professor at all.  He doesn’t even have a school email address, which is pretty fucked up.  But anyway, I have the ability to make up the midterm this Thursday at 8:45 in the morning.  I guess it’s not bad, you know, if I wake up on time.  I should be very grateful.

Greatful?

I should be great.

I should feel great.

No.   I can’t.  There’s a lot of shit going on and I feel like I will breakdown any second.  Not in the emo way, but in the OH CRAP CALL AN AMBULANCE way.  I sure hope not, but I’m in pain from my cerebral cortex to my right pinky toe.

Anyway, the moral of this story is that I need to marry Orlando Bloom and you all need to do my homework for me.  Bye!

Dear Steve,

Hello there!  How are you?  How’s college?

Hard, right?

Don’t you regret leaving the greatest house and neighborhood in all of children television history?  I sure do.

I have watched every single Blue’s Clues episode that you have been in; not because I’m a child at heart or a really messed up person, but because I have a brother who is ten years younger than me and was forced to watch you as I babysat him.  A few years after your departure from the show, I realized that I grew up with you and I have actually developed a crush on you.  I mean, who couldn’t?

Sure you’re currently one of my favorite musicians,  but that’s besides the point.  What I’m most concerned about is your heart.  You told all your viewers that you left for college when baby brother Joe took over.  How many times since your departure did you come back to visit?  Blue is your puppy.  She isn’t Joe’s.  She belongs to you.  How could you just leave her in the care of someone clueless about the world?  How do you just leave?  Sure, Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper are rather old and have some authority in the house, but still, didn’t you purchase that house?  What good has Joe ever done to you?  How could you just give him your house!?

Anyway, what I’m trying to tell you is that I am now in my third year of college, and I really don’t enjoy it.  What about you?  You’ve been gone for so long.  What are you doing, Steve?  Did you drop out?  Isn’t college hard?  What were you majoring in?  You probably majored in Drawing, Mr. Handy Dandy Notebook.

I’m having a hard time, Steve.  Help me out.

My mom is influenced by India. I would use the word ‘inspired’ but it’s more of an influence. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love Indian food…but I feel like a racist.

Anyway, I didn’t post a blog entry in August. This is bad.

School has started and great golly it’s good.